she was so not down for the gang bang
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize