i will never coherently bang her
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize