I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
