I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
