some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
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