Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
