I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
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