he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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