Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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