windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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