We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize