My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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