I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
You don't make any sense
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