Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
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