wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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