i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
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I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
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It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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