I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
