I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
