Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize