Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
