Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
