I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
