There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
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