I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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