Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
