P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
