You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize
