Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
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Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
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I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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