HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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