i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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