Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
