Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Shame - the story of my life.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
