what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
