No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
