Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
