hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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