thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
sarcasm needs its own font
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
