Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
