I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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