Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize