ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
