you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
