i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
