My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Randomize