Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Only a mothe r could love this liver
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
