i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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