i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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