Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
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