I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
3 2 1 whiskey
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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