You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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